Trailer Stash: Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer 2005's unnecessary take on the Fantastic Four was fun anyway. But this is a film that deserves a sequel? Flame on! By Sara Brady Icon by Lisa Martin

I must confess, I deeply enjoyed 2005's Fantastic Four, I really did. Obviously, it was idiotic, and one of my friends walked around shouting "Flame on!" every forty-seven seconds for about a month afterward and Jessica Alba is almost the least necessary actress on planet Earth, but the movie, with all of Julian McMahon's shamelessly evil mugging and Ioan Gruffudd stalking around with his jaw clenched pretending he was actually on the deck of the H.M.S. something-or-other and this is just a momentary setback, was insanely entertaining. And Michael Chiklis was awesome. But is this a film that deserves a sequel? Apparently.

Click here to watch the trailer for Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer.

The trailer for Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer opens with a silver blur streaking through space before segueing into Mr. Fantastic and Invisi-Girl's wedding. Jessica Alba still has that awful blonde hair that looks like complete crap on her. I don't understand why Fox keeps inflicting such indignities on her after the spectacular mess that was the first film's premiere. Anyway, she smiles beatifically at Ioan Gruffudd, Chris Evans smirks hotly, and the Thing dabs at his eyes. Chiklis, again, was the best part of the first movie, mainly because, as with Bill Nighy's great performance in Pirates of the Caribbean II: Now With More Parrots, you could actually see the acting going on underneath the pile of prosthetic junk on his face. I want him to do a Commish reunion dressed as the Thing.

But lo, there is a disturbance in the wedding force. There seems to be a shadow over the proceedings, a shadow cast by... that rather small silver blur streaking through the sky. Sure, that obeys the laws of, like, shadows. Mr. Fantastic panics, because that's what he does. Torchy protests, "I just bought this tux," thus reigniting the debate from the first film: What happens when the Human Torch is extinguished? His clothes, they seem to be consumed by his flaming. When he stops flaming, is he nekkid? Or does he just wear his superhero suit under all his clothes, à la Clark Kent? Or does he have some sort of automatic, back-up nekkidness-obscuring mechanism, like the Incredible Hulk? Discuss.

Johnny jumps off the side of the building shouting "Flame on!" and combusting as soon as he's out of frame. I love it when he does that. Then we learn that the Silver Surfer can blur his way through solid objects. It's nice to see Robert Patrick getting work. "Aw, that is cool," Johnny says, still en fuego. Silver Surfer slides down the front of a building, doubtless enraging the Window-Washers' Local 106, setting off a bunch of car alarms and enraging every New Yorker in earshot, before buzzing into the Lincoln Tunnel, with Torchy in hot pursuit. This might be a good time to note that Doug Jones, who was memorably amphibian in Hellboy and had creepy eyeballs in his palms in Pan's Labyrinth, plays the Surfer. Bendy little sucker, isn't he?

They exit the tunnel, whizzing by a tollbooth attendant who, if Johnny were actually flammable, would now look like Nicolas Cage in Ghost Rider. Blazing over a mysteriously wooded section of New Jersey, they fight, and Silver decides to launch them both into the upper atmosphere and then into outer space, which abruptly extinguishes Johnny (because there is no fire in space, Jerry Bruckheimer), causing him to fall back through the Earth's atmosphere. Where he would burn up... if he weren't already made of fire? This movie's physics makes my head hurt.

And that is it. Like The Devil Wears Prada's first trailer, this teaser used a full scene from the beginning of the movie rather than sewing together clips, and I think I like the strategy. But next time, more Thing! Less ugly blonde hair! Thanks!